Sunday, July 25, 2010
I ARE LONESOME IN THIS BIG UGLY CITY
ITS FIVE THIRTY
HIYA MOMMA I'M AT WORK AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IVE GOTTEN TO SIT DOWN SINCE TWELVE THIRTY. I SURE HOPE THIS LETTER GETS TO YOY CAUSE YOU SAID IT WOULD TAKE FOR DAYS AND ITS THE FOURTEENTH TODAY RIGHT? WELL YES. I HATE MY JOB PER USUAL BUT ITS OKAY. I DECIDED THAT I WILL LIKE STANLEY STEAMER ALL SUMMER AND THEN I WILL GET THINGS DONE. SEE, IF I GO OUT IN SEATTLE I WONT BE HOME AND I WILL BE INEFFICIENT. AS IT IS, I GET A LOT DONE WITH STEAMER OUT ON LUMMI ISLAND PLAYING WITH THE FISHIES AND THE INDIANS. YESTERDAY I WENT TO THE STORE TWICE AND MADE TWO BATCHES OF CHOCOLATE CHIP CAKE COOKIES THINGIES AND FIRED OOPS FRIED A CHICKEN (IT TOOK AN HOUR SO I WOULD BE SURE IT WAS DONE) AND GAVE SARA A BATH AND CLEANED MY ROOM AND DID THE DISHES TWICE AND WENT FOR A WALK AND WROTE A THANKYOU NOTE TO MRS BURKHALTER. HOW ARE MARIE AND FRANK AND YOUR NECK? SAY HELLO TO THEM AND CONGRADULATIONS OR WHATEVER. I HOPE YOUR NECK DOESNT BOTHER YOU TOO MUCH. HELLO AUNT MARIE HOW ARE YOU? HELLO UNCLE FRANK HOW ARE YOU? WHY DONT YOU TWO COME UP AND SEE ME SOMETIME? ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE SICK I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU HOWEVER I WOULD RATHER YOU WERE WELL EVEN IF THAT MEANT I COULDN'T SEE YOU. HMM. I WORK IN THE EMERGENCY COMPOUNDING THE RED TAPE THAT SURROUNDS COUNTY INSTITUTIONS. I CIRCLE THINGS, CHECK THINGS, X THINGS, TYPE THINGS, ADMIT PEOPLE THINGS AND THE LIKE. AND I MAKE LISTS. THAT PART I LIKE SINCE IM A LISTMAKER FROM WAY BACK. NOW I WILL GIVE YOUA LIST OF WHAT PRESENTS MINNE WANTS FROM BIGMOMMA: SOMETHING LEATHER, NO FURTHER COMMENT. THATS WHAT SHE SAID. SHE DOESNT WANT A SWEATHER I GUESS. I WAS THINKING IF YOU COULDN'T GET A BLUE SWEATER YOU COULD GET A GRAY AND WHITE SWEATER. THAT MIGHT BE NICE. I RUNNED OUT OF THINGS TO SAY. DONT LET AND FOREIGNERS PINCH YOU. ONLY UNCLE FRANK. BRING YAKKY LOTS OF GOODIES. I BET IF YOU SENT THEM IN THE MAIL THAY WOULD GET HERE. MARC SAID HE WOULD DRIVE ME TO TACOMA TO GET THE CAR ON HIS MOTERCYCLE. MINNE AND MARC BOUGHT A RED 1961 VOLKWAGON, AND A HOUSE. YESTERDAY THEY BOUGHT FTHE CAR FOR A THOUSAND DOLLARS. THEY GET IT TODAY MINNE IS ALL EXCITED. NOW THEY WILL HAVE TO GET INSURANCE. THEY PUT A DOWNPAYMENT ON A FARM HOUSE (NOT THE ONE THE ORIGINALLY WANTED_THIS ONE IS MORE RUN DOWN) THIS SUNDY THEY WILL GO TO POULSBO TO SEE IT AND STUFF. MARC IS GOING TO SUMMERSCHOOL. I HAVEN'T GOTTEN MY GRADES YET. SARA GOT SEVEN NEW PAIRS OF TRAINING PANTIES AND SHE WET ALL OF THEM IN ONE DAY AND RAN AROUND NAKED HALF THE DAY. SHE HASNT QUITE GOT THE HANG OF IT YET_AND I DONT THINK SHE WANTS TO: SHE KEEPS BRINGING US DIAPERS TO PUT ON HER. SHE DOESNT LIKE THE PANTS CUZ WHEN SHE WETS IT RUNS DOWN HER LEGS INSTEAD OF REMAINING WARMING UNSIDE HER DIAPER. TOUGH LUCK KID. THERE WAS A MISTAKE LAST SUMMER ABOUT MY RETIREMENT BENEFITS AND I MIGHT BE GETTING ABOUT FIFTY MORE DOLLARS. YIPPEE. WHEN I WENT TO THE STORE IT WAS VERY SAD BECAUSE I HAD NO MONEY AND I WANTED TO SPEND SOME. I MOSTLY WANTED TO BUY SOME MATERIAL TO SEW. I STARTED TO KNOT ON MY SWEATER OF LAST SUMMER AGAIN. IM UP TO THE ARMPITS. GOODIE I WILL BE RICH SOMEDAY. JUST YOU WAIT THEN YOU CAN GO TO EUROPE EVERY SUMMER ON YAKKYS MONEY JUST LIKE YAKKY IS GOING TO SCHOOL EVERY WINTER ON MOMMAS MONEY. THE MOST BEAUTIFUL INTERNIN THE WORLD GOT MARRIED LAST WEEK. WOE IS ME.
THIS IS PARAGRAPH TWO. I TAKE CARE OF THE BLOOD BANK HERE. THATS FUN I TAKE THE BLOOD TO THE OPORTATING ROOM OR WHAT EVER AND I CALL THE BLOOD BANK FOR BLOOD AND STUFF. THATS IN MY SPARE TIME...BUT I DONT HAVE ANY. I HAVE TO EAT LUNCH WITH THE GIRL WHO STINKS BECAUSE I DONT KNOW ANYONE AND BEING MY USUAL OUTGOING SELF I DONT TALK TO ANYONE. THIS YEAR THERE ARE MANY PEOPLE MY AGE -- EVERYONE EXCEPT THE GIRL WHO STINKS AND THE SUPERVISOR -- BUT IM NOT MUCH LIKE ANY OF THEM AO I DONT SAY MUCH. THEY HAVE NO REVERENCE FOR THEIR PATIENTS. ALL THEY DO IS SIT AROUND AND SMOKE AND SAY ROTTEN THINGS AND TAKE HOUR AND A HALF LUNCH BREAKS WHILE I WATCH THEIR DESK. I THINK THE TAKE ME FOR A DOPE BECAUSE I DONT TALK. THEYLL GET THEIRS BOY. HO HO HO
NOW THAT I HAVE VENTED MY EMOTIONS I SHALL AGAIN BE MY CHEERY SELF. SOON IT WILL BE TIME TO GO HOME AND I AM GLAD. IN THREE HOURS I WILL BE IN BED. THE ELEVATORS DONT WORK VERY GOOD HERE AND I AM AFRAID OF THEM so i walk UP THE STAIRS. TWIICE TO THE TENTH FLOOR TONIGHT. DUMB KIDS -- THATS THE PEADIATRICS FLOOR. I LIKE IT THE BEST.
I THINK I SHOULD HAVE DOUBLE SPACED THE LINES BECAUSE IT IS RATHER HARD TO READ. MAYBE I WILL DOUBLE SPACE THE WORDS IN STEAD, A L R I G H T N O W T H I S I S B E T T E R . NO ITS NOT. FIND SOME CUTE BOY AND SEND HIM HOME TO ME. I ARE LONESOME IN THIS BIG UGLY CITY. ID RATHER BE IN THE WOODS OF THE OCEAN IN BELLINGHAM AND SURROUNDING AREAS. TOUGH LUCK. SEND A POSTCARD IN YOU HAVE TIME. I HAVE TO GO TAKE CARE OF MY BLOOD NOW. LOVE TO ALL --- YAKKY
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Oh My Gosh...this is the dumbest letter I have ever written and now here it is for the world to see. Please know that I am truly more intelligent than it seems in this note....which, I might add in my defense, was written at 5:30 in the morning after a long night shift. Okay...the part about keeping Stanley Steamer around because it would save time was pretty funny. As it turned out, I kept him around for years!!!
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